Secrets to Happiness # 5: Gotta Have Some Self-Control

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Going back to our Happiness Series, today we talk about self-control

To be happy you have to have self-control.

Self-control has to be exercised at two different levels:

 

1.     Emotional versus rational:

Remember the reason it\s so hard to be happy: we all have negative thoughts  - because part of our brain (amygdala)  is always scanning the world for problems as a survival tool - it is our emotional side.

On the other hand, we have a rational side in our brain (pre-frontal cortex) which helps you think things through.

The trick is not to control our emotions, but rather to control our reactions to our emotions.

 

2. More versus enough

Today we live in a culture of more instead of the old culture of enough - it's a growing trend for over a century - known as Consumer Economy.

People are no longer content with enough but wanting always something more; it's not about needs but desires. More, more we all want more. It’s the “Keeping up with the Joneses” syndrome.

When faced with this reality, remember that a persona can have everything if he has the knowledge of having enough.

 

 

One of the core values we have as a company is to inspire and empower people in all aspects of their lives. Additionally, if you want to read about our Custom Software Solutions and Consulting Services, please visit www.isucorp.ca

Use Fear to Fuel Your Success

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Do one thing every day that scares you.”
-Eleanor Roosevelt

Fear is a common denominator in our lives. It is a current of thought energy that, if allowed, can keep us imprisoned in a useless place of comfort and predictability.

Using fear as a point of reference, we could say there are two types of people:

Type One are those who are controlled and consumed by their fears.

Type Two are those who choose to embrace them, make friends with them and harness their energy to fuel their dreams.

 

The difference between them is that Type One will surely live an incomplete life of guilt and unhappiness, while Type Two will most likely come out the other side stronger, smarter, wiser and on their way to success.

We all experience fear. It can paralyze us or bring the best out of us, and we’re not talking about danger here; danger is very real, while fear is only the product of our interpretation of certain event in our lives.

It is said that the word FEAR stands for Fantasized Experiences Appearing Real (it’s also said that it stands for F*** Everything And Run, but let’s stick to the first one); whatever you may call it, you can use it to remember what’s important to us, and fuel your success.

For the following 3 articles, we’ll be covering three practical ways to look at fear:

  1. Fear is excitement in disguise
  2. It shouldn’t paralyze you but energize you
  3. It is a great motivator for personal growth

 

Quoting Eleanor Roosevelt again, you gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, ‘I lived through this. I can take the next thing that comes along…

Looking forward to our next delivery.
In the meantime, stay strong!

 

 

One of the core values we have as a company is to inspire and empower people in all aspects of their lives. Additionally, if you want to read about our Custom Software Solutions and Consulting Services, please visit www.isucorp.ca

Secrets to Happiness # 4: Accept Yourself

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How do we accept ourselves and think highly of others at the same time?

 

There a 3 steps to achieve a high opinion of yourself:

Don’t Hide

People tend to mask themselves in a form of self-judgment in some cases because they do not want to be judged by others and in other cases because of humility - either way, it has to do with fear; fear of expressing their own accomplishments. 

 

Stop Apologizing

Apologizing for your accomplishments or for who you are is another form of self-judgment. Apologizing avoids ownership, creates distance and suggests a mistake.

 

Accept

Find what's hidden, stop apologizing and accept yourself. You have no responsibility to live up to what other people think you ought to accomplish - you are not responsible for what other people expect you to be.

You are who you are, it makes you unique, accepting who you are improves your confidence, confidence opens the doors to accomplish growth and your internal goals. 

 

 

One of the core values we have as a company is to inspire and empower people in all aspects of their lives. Additionally, if you want to read about our Custom Software Solutions and Consulting Services, please visit www.isucorp.ca

Secrets to Happiness # 3: Confidence Breeds Success

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As we talked about before, happiness happens only by accomplishing internal goals.

In order to achieve your internal goals, you have to have confidence - confidence in yourself and confidence of others.

Your opinion of yourself can be high or low and your opinion of others might also be high or low.

 

When it comes to confidence there are 4 different levels, of which only one provides true happiness: 

1.  High opinion of yourself and a low opinion of others:

People who tend to see themselves on a high level of opinion and see other people on a low one are usually arrogant - they don't understand that having a high opinion of others doesn't lower the opinion of themselves. This is the type of person who feels they need to be better than others in order to boost his/her own confidence, and as a result are never happy, since there is always somebody else who they have to compete against.

2.   Low opinion in yourself and a high opinion of others:

Then there are those who have a high opinion of others, but a low opinion of themselves. They tend to beat themselves up and are therefore insecure. Doesn't matter how well you do, there is always somebody else who is doing better than you.

3.  Low opinion of yourself and a low opinion of others:

People who have no high opinion of anyone including themselves are usually cynical. They tend to see problems everywhere and in every corner. Being cynical is the complete opposite of confidence.

 

And, finally... 

4. High opinion of themselves and high opinion of others:

This is the true definition of confidence. People who tend to have a high opinion of themselves and others are usually secure, positive and therefore, happy.

 

 

One of the core values we have as a company is to inspire and empower people in all aspects of their lives. Additionally, if you want to read about our Custom Software Solutions and Consulting Services, please visit www.isucorp.ca

 

Secrets to Happiness # 2: Internal, Fulfilling Goals

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Some weeks ago we wrote an article that said that the No. 1 Secret for being happy is to be happy first and THEN be successful; not the other way around.

 

Today we’ll write about the Secret No. 2: 

No matter how many external goals you achieve, happiness comes only by accomplishing internal ones.

External goals become unlimited; people tend to set goals, and once accomplished, they set new goals -nothing wrong with it except for the fact that, by itself, it does not translate into happiness. The reason it never translates into happiness is due to the fact that we expect other people’s approval.

You might be working in a well-paid job with a great title but not be happy about it since it does not fulfill your inner self.

When it comes to goals, internal goals are those set with the “DO IT FOR YOU” concept in mind,  not for competition purposes. 
You are doing it because you want to, because you enjoy it, and because it provides meaning to your life and to those people who are part of it.

You are not expecting approval or reward; you are just enjoying the ride and increasing your confidence.

 

 

One of the core values we have as a company is to inspire and empower people in all aspects of their lives. Additionally, if you want to read about our Custom Software Solutions and Consulting Services, please visit www.isucorp.ca